All of a sudden

Don't you just love all these people who finally notice your improvements? I've been stopped today by no less than 3 people, and they are all shocked at my look; its great, because I'm not even "there" yet. But what gets me, is how they phrase it "How did you do it so fast?" Excuse me?? You may not have noticed me when I was 20 lbs down, or even 25 lbs down, but all of a sudden its obvious and it happened overnight?! I don't think so!! I busted my but for those 30 lbs, and it sure as hell didn't happen in 1 night!! LOL, its just amazing at how, they didn't notice at 10, and they didn't notice at 20, but 30, WOO, i'm a totally different person or something! Ok, rant over.

May 31, 2007

Oh, man, I don't know what's wrong with me today! I'm hungry! I had lunch with my kids today since its the last day of school (read, I sat there and watched them eat, cause i had eaten before hand) I seriously didn't know if I could avoid stealing a fry!! Thankfully, they were pigs today and ate it all, otherwise, I might have had some demons to contend with! So I came home and fixed myself a protein shake, since I was still so hungry, but I'm wondering if my TOM is coming up again; there is no other explanation for these monster cravings like this! For some reason, he rears his ugly cravings about 2 weeks before the fact, so I have to contend with his crap literally 3 weeks out of the month. Oh, the joys of being a woman!!

May 31, 2007

Do you know what I hate most about working out? The minute you stop, you pretty much lose all benefits of it. I worked out practically religiously for 6 months, and then about march, spring break, I took a break. I haven't done a work out since then, so what's that, 2 months? OMG, I am so sore from yesterday, I have to flop into all my chairs!! This bites! And I'm really hungry today and yesterday!! Is this from working out? If so, it can wait! I have 31 more days for my goal, and I haven't lost anything. I'm hoping for a whoosh, though; don't they say that when you get "jiggly" your about to lose? My tummy has been really jiggly lately, more so than I remember before. And my legs, very odd...I really hope that when this process is all said and done, its all tightened up as much as possible. I mean, I know the stretch marks are an issue, but I don't want no jelly legs!! Do you think maybe this is something that might prohibit people from reaching their goals? The not knowing where they will end up? I mean, what if your not happy with the end product? At least when you were fat, you weren't all saggy, right? Oh, lord, listen to me. I'm all vain sounding, aren't I!! I don't know; I want to look good, but skinny doesn't always mean healthy, and that's something I need to remind myself of, I suppose...

May 29, 2007

Ok, I am bound and determined to get to my goal by July 1st. Only 33 days to lose approximately 25 lbs. That's less than 1 lb a day; can I do that?? I am NOT going to sit around a mope about it not happening!! I had slow to no losses in May; according to the "May biggest loser" challenge, I am only down 5 lbs in may!! OMG, that is not acceptable. So far, here is my plan of action for getting to where I want to be....

* During the week, I will have 1 or 2 shake meals. On the days that I have 1 shake meal, I will have EWs for the other meal. Dinner will be strictly protein.
* I am going to start working out. Pilates on T&Th, strength training on MWF.
* No more "little bit" of bad stuff!! No coffee (except what I put in my shake) because I add creamer! No salad, cause I use the bad dressing!
* Water is my friend; it does wonderful things for me, so I will repay it by DRINKING MORE OF IT!!
* My dinner will consists of ONLY lean protein, but no beef!! So chicken and fish will become my friend! I will find wonderful recipes to help spice them up, so they are no so bland and boring.
* I WILL NOT become frustrated with a lack of loss during this time!! I will know that it is my body's way of throwing a hissy, and I am STRONGER that that!! GIving in is what it wants; if I can hang in there, I WILL SEE The improvement!

OMG, I have a headache!! LOL. I really really want this, and I'm having trouble with being comfortable in my body now, because I haven't been this low in YEARS, so... I'm trying to push myself to my goal, because I know that I won't be happy staying here for very long!! This starts NOW!! (Any suggestions are most welcome to add to my list!)

May 28, 2007

Ok, so no change for me over the weekend, but the weekends, for some reason, come off as a "free time", not that I was bad, I just wasn't strict. We go out to eat on the weekends more, etc, so ... With summer coming, I am definitely going to have crack down on myself. I am a little more than halfway to goal; I am thinking I'm going to start exercising this week; I will add in pilates, and right now I have a strength training workout for women, sort of training yourself to do chin ups. I hope it won't stall me, but right now, I want to tone up what I've got. Cross your fingers for me; I really want to hit that july 1 goal; we are doing family pictures that weekend, it would be nice to be there!

Slide shows

I have had some recent complaints that my page isn't loadable, so I took as much shit off of it as I could, including my slide shows. SO, I thought I would stick them in my blog, so if you want to see them, you can; if not, no biggie.

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I feel...

Friday
I can't get over how good I feel! I have lost 30 lbs, and I swear, I'm acting as if I've already reached goal! I keep telling myself "You don't look that good yet!" but I feel good about myself, and I'm actually wearing shorts and camis out of the house. There are only a FEW things left in my closet that I can't wear; the majority of which are shirts that are too small for my big boobs! I'm wearing a size 10 in pants (Hello, can you say high school!! Of course, I think there is a difference between a 9 junior and a 10 regular, but I'm going to pretend like there's not . There is actually a definition to my waist, and my stomach doesn't pooch out past my boobs. I have always liked the shape of my body (I'm thick, though, arms, boobs, torso, legs, thick all around) but I'm proportionate. So, when they say that as you lose, you just become a smaller version of your old self for a while, That's ok by me!! And I'm sitting here laughing at myself for typing all this out, because I probably don't look as good as I feel... but I feel so damn good right now!! And I'm only halfway there! Imagine how sexy I will be when I actually reach goal!! I'm totally pumped, excited, bouncing on my toes, and I can't wait to get there. :-*

I added pictures to my yahoo page this week; compare start to now, that's a 30-lb difference. Tell me if you notice much, cause I can't say that I do!

May 23, 2007

We are relearning to use 1 vehicle this week, and let me tell you, it is a big ol pain in the @$$. It will be better when school is out (5 more days), but right now, we leave so early, 6, to drop Jon off, but its a waste of gas to come back home, not to mention that by the time we got back home, we'd have to turn around to go back to school, that we just go and sit in the school parking lot until it's time to drop the kids off. *SIGH* This weekend is a 3 day weekend, for memorial day, and I'm trying to not let it bug me that the kids get monday off, but have to go back to school for 3 more days. It seems like Friday should be their last day; why take 1 day off, and then go back for 3 more days? I mean, does that really matter for kindergarten/first grade? LIke I said, *trying* not to let it bug me.

May 19, 2007

I'm down another 2 this morning; feeling good about that. 5 more pounds, and I'll be in virgin fat. it feels good to have these losses after the stall that I had; but I came back after my cheat, and muscled through it. I wonder if I needed the cheat to sort of reset myself? I had no gain with the cheat, and of course it was like starting all over, so the first 3 days sucked, but it "worked"?!

May 19, 2007

Well, I have had a stressful 24 hours. Thursday night, on the way home from work, the car broke down on my husband. He was pretty much down the road from the house. So, he comes home, and we are already late to something we have to get to that is out of town, so we leave the car on the side of the road. When we come back, the car is gone. We called the police, DPS, and Sherrif's office to see if any of them towed it; none of them had a record of it being towed. OMG, someone stole our car!! So, we file a stolen vehicle report, we call the insurance to file a claim, only to find out that our insurance is deficient in this category of vehicle problems (this wasnt' suppose to be this way, we are required by the bank to have this insurance! So basically, we are screwed). Well, after spending all day Friday stressing out over this, the sherrif's dept calls us Friday night about 7 to let us know they have located the car, and its at a wrecking yard, and we gotta go pick it up. So, we call the wrecker, and get the answering service, and the only time we can pick up the car is 3. WEll, My husband has to work today, so guess who gets to do it by herself?! Not to mention the fact that the reason it was on the side of the road to begin with was because it was broke down. NOT TO MENTION the fact that they charge like $150 a day fine until you pick up your car. First of all, I don't have the money to get the car out; second of all, its not running, and so I have no freaking idea how this is going to play out, but its REALLY got my blood pressure pumping high today; needless to say I woke up with a migraine. On the bright side, I'm down another 3 lbs this week.

Saturday
Ok, so I went to get the car out, $300 down the tube I didn't have. IT was basically out of gas, so I put gas in it, drove it to the parking lot across the street, and sat and waited for my husband to get dropped off by some very nice person he works with . The ordeal is over, but the car is still ready to keel over any minute, so it does need shop work, so we are going to have to learn to use 1 car again (its a pain, jon has to go to work before 630, and then the kids go to school at 730; geeze, with the gas the way it is, its hardly worth driving back home and then going back for an hour. Luckily, there is only about 8 days of school left, so I guess I will bring a book and sit in the car for a week). Hopefully, we can come up with the money to fix the car. I wish it really was stolen (except for the insurance thing, which, by the way, we fixed the minute they told us they found the car).

May 15, 2007

*sigh*. Why is it so hard to get back on once you've fallen off? I'm in day 2 of my restart, and I can't stop thinking of everything bad that I can't have. I'm not even hungry; last week, I had a few days where I had issues with work, and was working on a few projects, and got SOOO wrapped up in them, I totally forgot to eat. Forgot to eat; as in, I wasn't hungry!! And that was last week, the week I cheated all day. so, I'm really wanting this, and I was hating myself the whole time I was cheating, and so I'm trying to get back into ketosis, and its REALLY hard! All I want is what I can't have!! Ugh, I hope to get past this soon.

May 11, 2007

I can't believe how the week has gotten away from me. All week has felt like friday, and now its finally friday, and I can't believe it. I've been having issues with work; stressing me out immensely. I've had some down time, so I made up a web page for my cakes, if your interested.

http://home.earthlink.net/~amandasolorza/

After a 2 week stall, and then this week of falling off the wagon, I finally had a 1 lb loss this morning; pray for me this weekend, my husband wants to take me out to eat for MOther's day; we are going to Shoguns, its a japanese restaraunt where they cook in front of you, twirling their knives around and stuff? Well, its good, and I love it, so PRAY!! LOL

I have a website...

For my cakes!! Sort of. Its still in the construction phase, but its there!!

Amanda's Cakes

May 9, 2007

well, I have no idea what happened, but apparently it wasn't really my TOM?? my body is doing some wacky stuff. So, I'm frustrated, and I'm stalled, so I cheated; I need to go back to KE and put myself back into ketosis. I was being really careful before, but I'm afraid that my coffee may have been what was stalling me; I had cream in it. I know it has a few carbs, but coffee REALLY helps me go to the bathroom, and I figured those few carbs were worth that. I may have to try cutting it out completely (I cant stand it without the cream) to see if that helps move me along. I've been stuck right at 178 for nearly 3 weeks now.

May 9, 2007

OH, CRAP. I've fallen so far off the wagon, I can't even see the dust from the wheels. *sigh*.

Back on tomorrow. I finally started today (for real this time, no false start like the other day) so I'm hoping my "hormonal imbalance" can no longer be an "excuse" for my indiscretions. Going KE all the way for the rest of the week; PLEASE help me get through MOther's day; my husband wants to take me out to eat!!

May 8, 2007

*sigh*. Beginning of week 3 of my stall. I got some of that colon cleansing stuff, whole body cleanse I think is what its called; it finally helped me go to the bathroom where MOM and colace wasn't helping. I started this morning, sort of, so hopefully by the end of this week, I will have flushed out whatever fluids I was hanging on to; but its still very frustrating to have no movement in 3 weeks. I might could understand if I had like 5-10 lbs to go, but I still have a good 35 lbs on my body that could just take a hike. I am going back to KE this week, since that was the only time I had great success. The week I started regular kimkins is when I first started stalling. I'm thinking of adding back in exercise, which I haven't done in about 2 months, but I need to figure out the time for me to do that; I'm having issues at work, which are definitely stressing me out, and once the changeover happens, maybe I will be able to get into a better routine. I really need to do the exercise in the morning, cause I have ZERO energy by the time afternoon comes around, and I could go walking with my kids and hubby. which, is what I was hoping to do, but every day, I put it off cause of lack of energy. I'm frustrated, and that chocolate is looking good, and I keep telling myself that it will set me back, but I'm not moving forward anyway, so whats the difference....

You gotta see this!

OMG, ok, so Saturday, we went to Mercados (acidentally, of course, we didn't go JUST because it was cinco de mayo) and there was this guy there, and he asked us if the kids wanted a balloon. We were like, yeah, sure, ok. We thought he was going to go get a mercados balloon. THEN, he asked, what do they want? They have any favorite superheros? FLower, butterfly, etc? So we were like, yeah, sure, batman. Ok, STILL not getting it, we thought he was going to go get one of those mylar balloons that had batman on it. THEN, he pulled out a few balloons from his apron pocket; OMG, he's going to twist these balloons to look like batman!! It was so freaking cool, I took pictures, and had to share!! ;)

May 4, 2007

I"m still a little frustrated this week; last week was my second week, and I had no loss all week; then monday morning of this week I woke up 3 lbs lighter. Now, this week, since monday, I have had no losses again! Its very disheartening, and I'm trying very hard to stay on track; I almost cheated yesterday, but I didn't. I know it was my TOM who was trying to convince me to have that ice cream. So, last week I think my problem was potty, and I did the tea to try to help me some, but I feel like a wierdo, and I don't want to be gross, but it doesn't seem to move it all out for me. I have diarrhea from it, but it doesn't seem like its enough, if that makes sense. And then, this week, potty on top of TOM. *blech*. I'll be happy to have him over and gone. I guess I need to try fiber instead of laxative; but that hasn't worked for me in the past, either. *sigh* Usually coffee helps me, or spicy stuff, but none of that is working so far.

Kathryn's School Musical

Kathryn had a school music program tonight; all the little 1st graders got to dress up and sing a song; of course, her's was the cutest song; if your interested in watching.

Kathryn's Music program

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And of course, here she is being silly afterwards with Kaylee S.